i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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