You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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