What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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