just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
