I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
