I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize