return my video game
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
