i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Randomize
