No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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