I got chris browned last night
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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