...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
