Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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