well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
