Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
