we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize