well most of my day revolves around power hour
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
