what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
