He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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