whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Terrible idea I love it
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
