tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
