Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
