have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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