Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
We are all done wearing pants today
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize