girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
