You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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