Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
