Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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