why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
