A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
