Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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