she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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