is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
When are your genitals available?
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
