Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
