I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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