Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
