Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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