Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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