i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
