I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
