I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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