It's Friday. Sex?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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