ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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