Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
