school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
