And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize