I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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