I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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