she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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