of course. lets lasso hookers.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
