I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
