i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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