Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize